Seafoodpunch

It was definitely cold outside, but the fresh air was a welcome change from the boring stink of the office. I wandered around aimlessly for a while, which was still more productive than anything I could have ever done at my desk. Playing solitaire is only fun for so long.

Feeling ambitious, I walk farther than usual and find a store full of all kinds of crap; perfect to pass the time. I walk the isles, poking at curiosities like crystal hot dogs, and cat shaped clocks. What’s even more fascinating is how many people are in the store with baskets loaded with stuff I wouldn’t give my worst enemy.

I start feeling uncomfortable. The shop owner has been following me around with her grey eyes for a while. All of sudden she sighs and says, “It’s about time you showed up. I was wondering if you’d ever pick up the yodeling pickle we’d put on hold for you.”

No, I’ve never been in the store, I have enough pickles, I don’t have my wallet, no I don’t want to see the new shipment of novelty packing peanuts and you’ve confused me for someone else. I blame the glaucoma evident in the shopkeeper’s eyes, but it’s not the first time I’ve been mistaken for someone else.

How many people are out there that look like me, I wonder? I guarantee that if not now, then in the past century, there has been at least one person born with an uncanny resemblance to this gorgeous reflection staring back at me right now.

TotallyLooksLike is a site with a similar idea. Not only does it compare people to each other, but to cartoons, statues, pets, nuts and vegetables that look like a specific person. Lets use a couple of Jacksons as reference: Jesse Jackson looks like a pug, no quesion, and Michael Jackson looks like one of those egyptian statues that have the habit of losing their noses as well.

It’s embarassingly entertaining to look at the site, but it does make you wonder: Is there some kind of lonely little dachshund that might look like me? Or a filthy rich Russian millionare whos twin I could pretend to be? Not only that, but how weird is it, that with the billions of looks influenced by our genes, so many people exist that look like siblings?

I guess in a sense it’s true that we’re all related, but I’d rather not wonder whether I’m dating someone who may have the same great-grandparents that I do. Back to the point: Comparing people to things like dogs, potatoes, broken statues and each other is another fun way to pass the time.

Thank you, that is all.