Seafoodpunch

I have nothing against art (except my own).

But when people line up in droves, fighting you for a peek at “maggot art”, you know that society has taken a turn for the worst.

It doesn’t take a special maggot to create a masterpiece, just one with enough energy to make it across a canvas.

I never thought that maggots would be taking jobs away from the rest of us. They’ve already proven to be better doctors at dealing with hard-to-heal wounds:  When the general surgeon is stumped by a festering sore that  has no chance of improving, maggots get thrown into the mix to save the day. They make sure to meticulously remove all dead cells while keeping healthy tissue intact. Maggots are capable of so much…and they don’t even have opposable thumbs…or even hands for that matter.

These chubby little worms promote healing, disinfect wounds and are willing to give doctors all the credit.

Who knew that a maggot was such a mensch?

The hospital is a fairly stressful environment though, even for the most experienced maggot, so it’s no surprise that many of these little grubs have turned to the arts.

Obviously their paintings don’t sell for much: First of all, maggots with a talent for wiggling around in paint are not that hard to come by. And second of all, maggots will do the job for a small piece of old bologna.

So in the end, all you’re paying for is the paint and the paper…and maybe some rotten meat.

I’m just worried about those bastard maggots undercutting my prices…

I need at least a whole pizza to do my job right.