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Horror Movie Diet
I already established that horror movies are an excellent form of birth control…
BUT they’re an even more effective dieting tool!
Ever try eating a mayonnaise slathered sandwich while watching “The Fly” ?
It’s IMPOSSIBLE!
If you can keep anything down while watching a slimy, mutant fly-man cough up what looks like a rotten vanilla shake then you DESERVE to eat.
The horror movie diet was MADE for me: I can’t even eat yogurt while watching E.T.
I mean, I have nothing against the little guy racking up the long distance charges on the telephone, but he is still pretty gross looking.
Inspiration for the ‘Horror Movie Diet’ came from a whole, crispy chicken that seemed more ominous that delicious while sitting on the dining room table. The zombie movie playing in the background ruined the meal for me.
I could just imagine this headless chicken turning zombie and then ramming itself into my face in a feeble attempt to get at my brains.
Thankfully a headless chicken with cannibalized drumsticks makes for a pretty pathetic zombie.
So, if you’re like me and have trouble saying no to a cheese pizza, burger, or whatever…then just throw on a graphic horror movie…Preferably in HD.
For several years now, Vlad has talked me into watching horror movies with him. (And I fall for it every time because I’m a stupid mom.) I wonder if I can stop the madness by ordering up Poultrygeist?
@Catlady: thanks for the nice suprise over at your site…but are you callin’ me a liar??!! and horror moves are good for you. poultrygeist will only make things worse, though.
@JD: the horror movie diet can be suited to anyone. I know people who lose their appetites while watching tellytubbies…so thats what they do. In your case, the fly would work. there is puking involved. and what the hell kihnd of surivival skill that?! I mean…i had to induce it years ago after too much wine…but gross. but thank you. I didnt know how talented I was…now i’m ready for 2012
@Marvin: haha. what?! that was the best part of the movie. and i think anyone with those spidery fingers isnt going to care about whats on the floor. And you dont even know where those fingers have been. yuck
I have a pretty strong stomach when it comes to horror. BRING IT! The only thing I canNOT stand watching is someone puking, and this, unfortunately, is shown on regular TV, not just horror movies. My husband and I were watching some kind of documentary on how you’d survive an Armageddon-type situation, and all of the sudden, I guess PUKING is a survival skill or something, because there it was. Totally unexpected. We both retched and turned the channel.
I can’t eat Reese’s Pieces while watching “ET.” Those spidery fingers picking them up off the floor. Does he know how DIRTY those are? NO! UGH!
BTW… I have a little something for you over at the CatLady’s house. Come on over!
BTW… I have a little something for you over at the CatLady’s house. Come on over!
I can’t eat Reese’s Pieces while watching “ET.” Those spidery fingers picking them up off the floor. Does he know how DIRTY those are? NO! UGH!