March 27th, 2009 
Seafoodpuncher Guest post by Micah Zuorski (completely unedited)
On Sandwichocracy *
How about ‘sandwichocracy’, a form of government where power is determined by sandwich. In a democratic sandwichocracy, a sandwich is chosen by the people.
In a fascist sandwichocracy, the people are given no choice but to love and obey the sandwich.
Under sandwich anarchy, the sandwich is probably actually two hubcaps with a bar of soap between them.
Sandwich monarchy; the guy with the biggest sandwich now essentially owns all the sandwiches, and will pretty much sandwich whatever he damn well pleases.
Sandwich communism; everyone gets the same sandwich, except the sandwich makers have no incentive to produce sandwiches, so sandwich production falls off and most people end up eating two hubcaps with a bar of soap.
Republic of Sandwich; Sandwich composition is determined by a series of laws. Ultimately the system is corrupted by the innate greed and short-sightedness of sandwich eaters, go get the hubcaps and soap.
* inspired by Dinosaur Comics
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So with the Crap Sandwich (the porkulus), the government forces you to pony up $18,000 for a crappy sandwich that you could have made yourself for pennies. And you have to use surplus Wisconsin cheese, and moldy liverwurst.
The zen sandwich is one slice of bread (for the hand that is clapping) with nothingness on it.
Ed: I always knew that the practice of Zen was never really that fullfilling.