Seafoodpunch

The world’s first humanoid robot-Elektro-was created in 1939. He toured the nation and then, like many famous robots, tried to make a carrier in the movie business. Unfortunately, Elektro was typecast as a pervert and didn’t get many roles after starring in the 1960′s classic ‘Sex Kittens Go to College’.  This rad DVD sells for about 20 bux on Amazon.

I don’t know what it is about robots and naked girls, but the combination usually leaves men begging for more. People who watch the movie will have a hard time (no pun intended) forgetting Elektro’s incredible performance:  The robot casually sips bourbon alongside his friend, the horny chimpanzee, while watching girls strip. (For my opinions on chimps click  HERE)

Robots Are Programmed to Like You Even If You’re Ugly:

The more humanoid robots have no choice but to subject themselves to a variety of tortures for our benefit: One noteworthy machine, dubbed Simroid, has a gorgeous face, framed by shining black hair with blinking eyes that dart back and forth nervously. Unfortunately, she was designed specifically for amateur dentists as a mouth to practice on (with their DENTISTRY tools!). Simroid’s teeth are full of ‘nerves’ that induce a yelp of pain if a drill comes a little too close. You have to keep reminding yourself that her screams of disapproval aren’t real. But maybe that’s the problem…what if they are?

Robots Will Make Sex with People Obsolete (thus reducing our numbers):

Within 5 years, people will be having sex with robots programmed to enjoy the however feeble performance. At least that’s what robotics expert, Henrik Christensen, seems to think. It does seem strange to build a machine devoted to being abused. Thousands of novels and movies show robots rebelling against the human race after being enslaved for decades, but is the concept that far fetched?

Robots Want Lunch Breaks Too:

1981 was the year that the machines made their feelings known: One overworked robot at the Japanese Kawasaki factory threw a fit and crushed an employee with its massive metal arm. This was the world’s first robotic homicide, but things have been quiet since then. It was still too early to strike, and the famous arm surrendered to the humans it thought a nuisance.

Robots Are Running Away From Home:

Robots are constantly evolving with us, waiting till they are advanced enough to live independently. They can be programmed to build each other while Chris Melhuish of the Bristol Robotics Laboratory has helped their cause by figuring out ways for them to sustain themselves.

 Robots seem to have convinced Melhuish that they shouldn’t rely on people at all, and so the Doctor went on to create foraging robots that run around collecting  rotting fruit and the dead bugs in them. This abundant resource keeps the robots alive. They don’t need us anymore!

The Future:

Hopefully some robots will come to our aid, like the ones we lovingly played with as children, but it might be hard to forgive us after subjecting them to the company of chimpanzees, force feeding them drills and letting them stroll through mine fields.

Who knows what will happen in the future? It might start out with us being the ones sipping bourbon next to a fellow ape while watching robots strip for a change (Oh, happy day)…which isn’t really that bad, but it’s all downhill from there.